Facing Eternity Across From Those That We Have Harmed….

– Just One of Many Reasons That I Deserve Hell –

( a mini-testimony about the horrors of sin )

Sin.  It’s what blinds us from the Truth. Sin Brings Death.  Are you tired of carrying yours around? Choose this day whom you will serve. Sin. Like cancer. It’s so serious that it brings forth death. Like cancer, it requires remission and separation from the body if we are to live.  If sin were allowed to continue to live it would go on harming forever and the end is death.

[Jas 1:15 KJV] Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

You may say you don’t know what sin is, but you’ll know if you’ve been sinned against.

Has someone ever purposely hurt your feelings, taken something from you, called your loved-one a name or hurt them?

We all know how it feels to be sinned against.

As a teenager, perhaps 14 years old, I once ‘went along’ with another kid who was using handcuffs to tease a younger little kid on our bus. Perhaps he was 10. Even worse, he was being teased in the presence of his mother, who happened to be our bus driver.

This ‘prank’ was more or less a part of an ongoing battle against her…for no other reason than being our driver. We felt it was our duty to make her life miserable. Basically just because she drove our bus.

Between previous and ongoing wrestling matches, screaming, throwing stuff out windows, and general ‘messing with others’ the entire year on the bus we stayed in trouble. We managed to terrorize her and others on the bus for an entire year of school. Just for the sake of doing it. When this instance with the handcuffs started, I didn’t come up with the idea, but was a participant. Originally in it for the laughs, trying to be ‘cool’ or keep status in my social group I went along. We decided we were going to see how far we could take things, basically.
But this time was worse than before. Her child was a special needs child.

I don’t remember exactly what happened, or how it started, but someone brought handcuffs and thought it would be funny to handcuff him to the bus rail.

It wasn’t funny.

She didn’t find it funny.

Her child certainly did not find it funny.

He was scared.

The look on his face haunts me to this day.

To my eternal shame I can never know how to find, how to make up for, or even ask for their forgiveness face to face. Nor would I deserve it.

I will never know if that child or his mother had or may still have nightmares, or if our driver ever forgave herself for bringing him on the bus. She was helping all of our parents and the community by driving us safely to school while we often made it as difficult as possible for her and every other person on the bus that was not involved.

In just that year, during the driving back and forth during school hours of the day, I can not recount what a miserable bunch of acts I must have committed. Tossing pennies out the windows towards cars on the road. Watching in horror as some kids spit on others, punched them, hit them with bags and books, but laughing about a lot of it. Sometimes talking down to weaker kids. Cheating on homework and guilting people who wouldn’t share theirs. Acting worse than an animal.

This would all be added to so many other incidents around school, the neighborhood, growing up and beyond :

Everything sarcastic.
Everything for laughs.
Everything for me, and whatever I wanted to do.
Everything whatever.

This all eventually headed it’s way into college and then my ‘adult’ life.

There it became beer, sex, and party.
Work, games, beer.
Date, party, travel.

Never giving back to people unless there was something potentially in it ‘for me’.
Selfish.
Prideful.
Lustful.

In my eyes, or man’s eyes, I will never be justified, and I shouldn’t be.

If given a chance today I would beg forgiveness from the kid and His family. But either way the damage was done.

Perhaps the damage to their family wasn’t life-long permanent, but it could be. I will never know, but either way they didn’t deserve it. Nor did anyone else.

Emotional damage is damage.
Psychological damage is damage.

In some ways these are much worse than physical damage. Physical things can sometimes be replaced.

Based on just this series of incidents, if God is good, then I don’t deserve to be spared from judgement. Especially if I’m to be compared to how ‘holy’or worthy of eternal reward or existence next to a perfectly sinless God who is a God who wants to provide love, safety and justice to His creation.

How could I ever claim to be ‘good’ or ‘better’ than others? I’m not.

[Isa 64:6 KJV] But we are all as an unclean [thing], and all our righteousnesses [are] as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

I don’t deserve mercy, and I certainly should pay for the damage I caused that child and family whom God loves.

I have screwed up thousands of various ways and moments since.

If God gave me what I ‘deserve’ based on everything He knows about every incident, in every person’s life, then I can never ‘right’ my way out of so many wrongs.

No matter how many prayers I say, or how many works I do, or how often I do them.

How demented and prideful to think that I ever could. And how can I justify sitting next to the kid on the bus in eternity in their presence in a place called heaven?

I am not alone.

According to the Bible, we have all sinned.

[Rom 3:23 KJV] For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

As a result of that sin, we all serve and deserve death and eternal judgment:

[Rom 6:23 KJV] For the wages of sin [is] death;
[Rom 6:6 KJV] Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with [him], that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
[Jhn 8:34 KJV] Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.
[Rev 20:12 KJV] And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is [the book] of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works.
[Rev 20:13 KJV] And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works.
[Rev 20:14 KJV] And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death.
[Rev 20:15 KJV] And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.
[Jde 1:14 KJV] And Enoch also, the seventh from Adam, prophesied of these, saying, Behold, the Lord cometh with ten thousands of his saints,
[Jde 1:15 KJV] To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are ungodly among them of all their ungodly deeds which they have ungodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which ungodly sinners have spoken against him.

When it comes to justice and judgement, feeling sorry doesn’t make it ‘right’. Feeling sorry only proves that sin is bad, and that we have come to agree that if God is good, then sinners must be separated from Him and any they would harm for eternity.

I know I’m a sinner. We all sin to our own shame, and not God’s.

God made us all, but He didn’t make me sin like I did. I had free-will :

[Jas 1:13 KJV] Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man:

I chose to go along. I didn’t stick up for the weak.

If I assume that we are all God’s creation, and that God loves all His creation equally, what is He to do with us besides judge us evil? What should He do?

He has to judge all, or judge none at all.

What to do?

I knew and agreed that I was in trouble. Should God offer me an eternal reward for sin? Eternal life? That would make God the ultimate bad guy.

God’s Plan: JESUS

God knows right from wrong. God is going to fix that which is wrong, and deliver justice.

That’s God’s plan.

But…for repentant sinners like me, God has always had a plan to offer mercy, instead of justice.

Life, instead of death.

By offering us Jesus:

[Mar 2:17 KJV] When Jesus heard [it], he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.
Sadly when God looks on us He sees there are no good or righteous people who carry the knowledge of sin: No one who has ever sinned can earn, nor ‘deserves’ salvation. No person can stand before God and explain to God how they were worthy or good.

[Rom 3:10 KJV] As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:
[Rom 3:11 KJV] There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.
[Rom 3:12 KJV] They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one.

God has always been deadly serious about sin. God’s so serious about sin, we all currently live under the death penalty. Afterall, according to the Bible, death is the result of sin. Meaning sin is the original and root-cause of death.

Rightfully so. We get what we’ve earned:

[Rom 6:23 KJV] For the wages of sin [is] death; but the gift of God [is] eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

His Way:

Thankfully God is long suffering for all of us…

[Rom 2:4 KJV] Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?
[1Ti 1:16 KJV] Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might shew forth all longsuffering, for a pattern to them which should hereafter believe on him to life everlasting.
[2Pe 3:9 KJV] The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

Thankfully God’s ways are higher than our ways.

[Isa 55:9 KJV] For [as] the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Salvation is a gift that can not be earned :

A gift is when we get something we did not earn.

God is and will always be alive; and though we have earned death by committing sins, we could and can be made alive if God gifts it to us and we accept His gift.

God’s gift offering of forgiveness through Jesus Christ who was sinless and confession of His righteousness, not our own, is so that any who come to Him may enter heaven humbly.

[Rom 3:25 KJV] Whom God hath set forth [to be] a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God;
[Rom 3:26 KJV] To declare, [I say], at this time his righteousness: that he might be just, and the justifier of him which believeth in Jesus.

Many of us feel bad about our sin, and try to chalk it up to a mistake, or say if we commit less sin it’s maturity. We may try to justify ourselves in that way. I did for years. But it’s not ture. It’s not right.

I finally looked in my mirror long and sober, and remembered the nightmares I must have caused. The pain and suffering. I will never know what I did to that mother and that child. Perhaps she blames herself, perhaps he still fears the bus to this day. I can never be justified even if I never break another one of God’s commandments :

[Rom 3:20 KJV] Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law [is] the knowledge of sin.

Yes, we are all sinners. Yes the sins we have committed deserve to be and someday will be judged. I did the crime, I should do the time. If I went into eternity and that part of my nature didn’t change I would be a cancer to God and those He loves for eternity.

The kid on the bus would have to look at me forever. Haunting him. Potentially causing him pain again.

If God saved us because we had done something good for Him, we might have reason to brag or think we deserved it.

[Eph 2:8 KJV] For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: [it is] the gift of God:
[Eph 2:9 KJV] Not of works, lest any man should boast.

But the truth is diametrically opposite. We didn’t do anything good for God—we caused the death of His Son! He loved us “while we were still sinners” still rebelling against Him, doing things He hates and finds disgusting. So do I.

[Rom 5:6 KJV] For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
[Rom 5:7 KJV] For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die.
[Rom 5:8 KJV] But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Can you believe how much God loves us?

God proved His love for us when He sent Jesus into the world as a man to suffer and die a substitutional death in our place.

Only because Jesus rose from death He can and does offer us a way back into an eternal relationship in the presence of God. Apart from sin and death and the grave.

God is patient, long-suffering that we may see our need for a way, a savior, help in a way that we can’t help ourselves.

[Jhn 3:16 KJV] For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
[Jhn 3:17 KJV] For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
[Jhn 3:18 KJV] He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

But for Jesus

He saved me when I called on Him in spite of all this.
All Glory to God and Jesus for His mercy and His sufficient grace.

For there is salvation in no other name! And if in this life, if I ever see that driver or her son I will beg their forgiveness too!

I pray they find it in their heart to forgive others and accept Jesus so that we can all be forgiven.

[Mar 10:31 KJV] But many [that are] first shall be last; and the last first.
[Luk 18:10 KJV] Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican.
[Luk 18:11 KJV] The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men [are], extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican.
[Luk 18:12 KJV] I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.
[Luk 18:13 KJV] And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as [his] eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.
[Luk 18:14 KJV] I tell you, this man went down to his house justified [rather] than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.

The Truth:

To come to understand that God sent Jesus to die for me…that He would accept me?

After all the sins I have committed?

That’s truly amazing.

Jesus offered himself completely out of His love, readiness to forgive and restore sinners who have come to try and reason with’ who they really are’ – before sitting next to the kid on the bus for eternity.

He died hoping that we would not reject the forgiveness He is so ready to offer us, so that in Him we can have the privilege to sit across from that mother and son and to be truly reconciled all of us into God on account of the suffering of His son for all our sins.

He gave His life for sinners like me who desperately need forgiveness rather than justice.

Undeserved, unearned mercy is required if there is to be anyone in heaven.

We can’t earn back our innocence, and we all have a past that has to be accounted for :
Besides babies ( who don’t go to Hell because God will not impose the eternal death penalty to one who is not able to willingly and knowingly sin ) we all end up earning hell one way or another.

AI Overview:  ( OUR EDIT IN GREEN CAPS )

Biblical sin is fundamentally missing God’s mark or purpose, involving actions, thoughts, or attitudes that transgress divine law, disobey God’s will, or fail to do what is right, stemming from a rebellious heart that seeks self-rule rather than God’s authority. Defined as “lawlessness” (1 John 3:4), it encompasses both commission (doing wrong, like murder, lying, stealing) and omission (failing to do good, like neglecting the oppressed). Originating with Satan and humanity’s fall in Eden (Genesis 3), sin leads to separation from God and PHYSICAL DEATH & HELL & spiritual death, though the Bible offers redemption through Jesus Christ.

Key Concepts of Biblical Sin

Missing the Mark (Greek: Hamartia): The core meaning is failing to hit a divine target, falling short of God’s perfect standard.
Transgression/Lawlessness (Greek: Anomia): Deliberately breaking God’s law, acting as one’s own law (1 John 3:4).
Rebellion (Hebrew: Pesha): Open defiance against God’s authority, as seen in Satan and Adam.
Iniquity (Hebrew: Avon): Moral corruption, crookedness, or perversity that leads to sinful acts.
Disobedience: Choosing to do what is wrong or failing to do what is right (James 4:17).

Examples & Manifestations

Acts of Commission: Murder, adultery, stealing, lying, coveting, idolatry.
Acts of Omission: Unthankfulness, indifference to suffering, failing to share the Gospel.
Internal States: Pride, selfishness, lust, anger, unbelief, a disposition to sin.

Origin & Consequences

Origin: Began with Lucifer (Satan) and entered humanity through Adam and Eve’s disobedience in Eden (Genesis 3).
Inheritance: A sinful nature (depravity) is passed down from Adam (Romans 5:12).
Separation from God: Sin creates a barrier between humanity and a holy God (Isaiah 59:2).
Spiritual Death: The ultimate consequence of sin is death (Romans 6:23).  // AND PHYSICAL DEATH TOO… & HELL 

Redemption

The Christian faith centers on redemption from sin’s power and penalty through Jesus Christ, offering forgiveness and restoration (John 16:8-9).

Biblically, dying in sin means dying separated from God, facing eternal judgment (the “second death”), and experiencing God’s wrath because the guilt of sin remains unforgiven, leading to eternal separation and torment rather than enjoyment of God’s presence; however, believers in Jesus Christ, who died for sins, are considered “dead to sin” and can have forgiveness, leading to eternal life with God, even if they struggle with sin before death.

Key Biblical Concepts:

“Dead in Trespasses and Sins” (Ephesians 2:1-3): People spiritually dead from sin are unable to help themselves or come to God; they need God to regenerate them.
“Wages of Sin is Death” (Romans 6:23): Sin leads to spiritual death and separation from God, but Christ’s sacrifice offers life.
“Dying in Your Sins” (John 8:21): This means dying with your unconfessed sins, resulting in condemnation and separation from God, a consequence believers in Christ avoid.

What Happens When You Die in Sin:

Unforgiven Guilt: The guilt of sin remains, causing terror and condemnation before God’s majesty.
Separation from God: Eternal separation from God’s joyful presence, facing His judgment.
The Second Death: Being cast into the lake of fire, a final destruction for those not in the book of life (Revelation 21:8).

How Believers Are Different:

Dead to Sin: Through Christ, believers are spiritually freed from sin’s power and considered “dead to sin” (Romans 6:11).
Forgiven by Christ: Jesus’ blood covers past, present, and future sins for those who believe, preventing them from “dying in their sins”.
New Life in the Spirit: A new spiritual nature guides believers, and though they still sin, they are covered by Christ’s righteousness.

In Summary:

Dying in sin means facing eternal consequences for unatoned sin, while dying as a believer means being covered by Christ’s atonement, leading to eternal life with God, not condemnation.

Jesus taught that sin originates from the heart (Matthew 15:19) and is a condition of unbelief in Him (John 16:8), a bondage from which truth and His coming offer freedom. He emphasized that the core of sin involves internal desires, not just actions, and his mission was to call sinners to repentance and offer forgiveness, though the greatest sin is refusing to believe in Him.

The Nature and Source of Sin

From the Heart: Jesus said evil thoughts, murder, adultery, and theft come from within (Matthew 15:19).
Unbelief: The primary sin the Holy Spirit convicts the world of is unbelief in Jesus (John 16:8).
A Condition of Enslavement: Sin enslaves people, but Jesus’s truth sets them free (John 8:32).

Jesus’s Response to Sin

Calling Sinners: He came to seek and save the lost, not the righteous (Matthew 9:13).
Authority to Forgive: He demonstrated power to forgive sins (Luke 7:48).
Forgiveness for Others: He taught that forgiving others who sin against you is necessary for God to forgive you (Matthew 6:14).

The Path Forward

Repentance: He called people to repent and “sin no more,” transforming their lives (John 8:11).
Internal Change: He stressed that internal purity and righteousness are crucial, not just outward observance of the law (Matthew 5:21-28).
His Purpose: His coming was to destroy the works of the devil and offer forgiveness through His blood (John 16:8, Matthew 26:28).

It’s a common belief that Jesus spoke more about hell than heaven, with some preachers emphasizing His warnings about judgment to highlight the need for salvation, but many scholars argue this is a misconception, noting Jesus spoke extensively about the “Kingdom of Heaven,” everlasting life, and the Father’s love, with references to hell often paired with heaven’s promise, and that a simple word count can be misleading as both subjects are crucial to His message of repentance and redemption.

Arguments for Jesus speaking more of Hell

Frequency of Warnings: Some analyses show numerous direct references to hell (often described as “Gehenna,” “outer darkness,” “unquenchable fire”) for the unsaved, with descriptions of eternal torment, gnashing of teeth, and hopelessness.

Urgency: The vivid descriptions of hell served as a stark warning about the consequences of sin and the reality of God’s judgment, motivating people to repent.
Default Destination: Some teachers suggest hell is presented as the default destination for humanity apart from Jesus, making its discussion essential.
Arguments against Jesus speaking more of Hell
Focus on the Kingdom: Jesus’s core mission was to bring the Kingdom of God, which involves everlasting life and the promise of being with Him, a more frequent theme.
Paired Teachings: Many instances of hell references are immediately followed by or linked to teachings about heaven, the Kingdom, or the fate of believers, balancing the scales.
Figurative vs. Literal: Some argue that references to “Hades” or “Sheol” (often translated as hell) are distinct from the final “lake of fire,” and that Jesus spoke more about the eternal state of the saved.
Conclusion

While Jesus’s warnings about hell are forceful and foundational to understanding divine justice, many sources suggest that a balanced view reveals He spoke at least as much, if not more, about the glorious Kingdom of Heaven and the promise of eternal life, with both concepts central to His call to choose the narrow path over the wide path leading to destruction.

[Eph 2:1 KJV] And you [hath he quickened], who were dead in trespasses and sins;
[Eph 2:2 KJV] Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience:
[Eph 2:3 KJV] Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
[Eph 2:4 KJV] But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us,
[Eph 2:5 KJV] Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)
[Eph 2:6 KJV] And hath raised [us] up together, and made [us] sit together in heavenly [places] in Christ Jesus:
[Eph 2:7 KJV] That in the ages to come he might shew the exceeding riches of his grace in [his] kindness toward us through Christ Jesus.
[Eph 2:8 KJV] For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: [it is] the gift of God:
[Eph 2:9 KJV] Not of works, lest any man should boast.

[Rom 4:16 KJV] Therefore [it is] of faith, that [it might be] by grace; to the end the promise might be sure to all the seed; not to that only which is of the law, but to that also which is of the faith of Abraham; who is the father of us all,

[Rom 5:2 KJV] By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

God is a Spirit, not a religion.  Yes, the bible is a religious book, but it is also a spiritual book.  God is the Spirit of Truth.  God’s Word has multiple functions that include both religious and spiritual works, concepts and applications.  No religious work can get you to God.  Jesus did the work of dying for your sins on the cross.  Religious people killed Him.  But the good news is that He rose again (in the flesh) on the third day by the Spirit of God because He had not sinned.  [John 1:17 KJV] For the law was given by Moses, [but] grace and truth came by Jesus Christ. [John 4:24 KJV] God [is] a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship [him] in spirit and in truth. 

The Spirit of God knows you better than you know yourself.  You can’t lie to God, either.  God knows if you want to give your life to Him, or live for yourself and your sins in this world. He certainly knows what you believe in your heart about His Son and if  you’ve accepted His payment for your sins, or not. That’s why God Himself will ‘validate’ your belief and personally send you His Spirit when He knows you have come into agreement with Him and believe in your heart that Jesus died for your sins and that He rose again. 

Until then, you are simply playing at religion or living for your old ways, but you will never fool God. 

[Luke 5:31-32 KJV] And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick.  I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

[John 3:7 KJV] Marvel not that I said unto thee, Ye must be born again.